Friday, September 29, 2006

Waggle Wiggle

I heard knocking while I was in my office on the computer, but ignored it thinking the sound was coming from my neighbors upstairs. I went out to the kitchen to retrieve the new ink cartridges I purchased for my printer (which are way too expensive). I began pulling them out of the boxes and inserting them into the printer when I heard the knocking again, this time is was too distinct to think it came from anywhere but outside my office window. I opened the blinds and first only saw a reflection of myself, a red long-sleeved shirt, a white peasant blouse over the top, and jeans. Then, I saw out the window and there is was- a white wigging weiner. A man was exposing himself to me and using his forefinger and thumb to waggle his penis. I threw the curtains shut, ran into the kitchen, picked up the phone, grabbed the phone book, and then paused while I look for the number to the police.

I called the cops, spoke to the dispatcher about what had happened, then the Officer called me to say he was on his way, and when he looked around the building, he came into my apartment and asked me some questions.

I am scared now. I felt threatened by that jiggling flaccid flesh. I was shaking as I dialed the police. I didn't want to step back into my office for a while and now I am afraid of when I return at night after work if he'll be waiting for me, to commit some sort of other sexual crime. My parents said they want me to get some pepper spray, a big flashlight, and to be careful. I want to get a taser. :) I am also going to call my apartment managers and let them know what happened, see if anyone else has reported such an incident, and maybe knock on some other apartment doors to let them know what happened.

3 comments:

cdoc said...

How scary! Definately alert your apartment manager. And stay safe. May I recommend a IMPACT Self-defense Class. They offer it in Grand Forks, not too many other places in the country, but it was beyond helpful. You don't have to be a student to take it. It is a weekend long, starting on a Friday night with classes all day Saturday and Sunday. That was a couple years ago, but I still am not as scared as I used to be. Aside from photography school, it was the smartest thing I have ever done.

Anonymous said...

Wow, that's awful!

Was everything ok last night? Surely this guy just randomly targeted your window - don't you think? You didn't recognize him or anything?
How long did he stand out there!! Oh, that's just gross.

Do you have any beefy guy friends in town that might stop by the apartment at random times just to check in? I know it's not very progressive thinking as a women, but I really do feel safer and better when a trusted guy is around.

changapeluda said...

Seeing as how you are fine:

I thought this post was way fucking funny! (sorry)

But the title. It's funny.