I called Andrew to ask him what kind of friend he is, I really meant to berate him. I did my best to do so. We made plans for lunch for Saturday. We met up at Perkins, which was odd since it was the very Perkins Andrew met my parents for the first time. We ordered, we talked, and it was nice. I viewed him as he is, an older man who is still trying to steady his life.
He said he had a present for me. I went out to his car with him when we were done eating. I helped him get his wheelchair into the car and managed to hit myself in the face with it while doing so. (I seem to be hitting myself in the face quite a bit-the power went out last night and while I was searching in the dark for my flashlight, I hit my mouth on the corner of my dresser). After, we finally got the chair in the car. I leaned down to hug him as I always do when I leave his presence. Except this time, when I leaned down, there was a look in his eye. I hugged him again and he kissed my cheek. So, I looked into his face and kissed his lips with mine. Soon, our lips were parting and our tongues were slow dancing. We stopped and started once more. Kissing him always felt so good and it felt good this time, too. I walked away feeling full and satisfied, and it wasn't just because of the pancakes.
He turned me on with those two kisses and I want more. I always did want more from him after a kiss.
Speaking of wanting more, I emailed Dr. Nordic God. I wrote that I am taking his lack of reply as a silent rejection, but that I would prefer a formal rejection since I hate the unknown. I added that if I was just being impatient, he can chalk it up to one of my many faults. I wished him well in his recovery. I know that whatever happens, I gave it a shot. I won't have to wonder "what if," which can be such an uplifting feeling.
3 comments:
What does this mean? Was it just a lapse, or does it mean more? What was the gift Andrew gave you? I hope this doesn't make things harder if you don't get back together. I just want what's best for you.
Andrew gave me a stuffed monkey to add to my collection of stuffed monkeys. :) I love them!
I don't even think I want to get back together. I loved kissing that man and when the opportunity presented itself, I went for it. I am attached to no one at this moment and kissing Andrew felt so of freeing since we aren't together and probably won't ever be together again.
Being with Andrew is not an option. He cannot provide what I need emotionally, however, I am still incredibly physically attracted to him. So, perhaps we can be friends with benefits. *grin*
hi, you :) have gave you a monkey AND kissed you? woo woo!! -- breelash (I have a blog here, too - my best friend and I share it. She writes sometimes (Carrie) and I write sometimes. so..hi :)
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